Blogmas Day 8: A (Nother, Other, Other) Grown Up Letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

I’ll cut to the chase, I know it’s been a hard year. I’d like to think that you were out of harm’s way up in the North Pole, but “global” means everywhere, and I’m sorry that your holly jolly neck of the woods wasn’t exempt from this pandemic crap. However, I saw you had a run-in with the m&ms, so I’m assuming you’re healthy, and for that, I’m glad! How’s the missus?

I was taking a gander at my 2019 list, and somehow you pulled nearly all of it off, with the exception of a puppy brother (honestly, thank you) and botox, but let’s be real, corona canceled botox, not you. Oh, and I’m not starring in any Netflix Christmas movies, but there’s always next year.

Obviously, Christmas looks a lot different this year, but I believe in the magic of Santa, so here goes!

1. To see my family… Christmas will make it a year since I’ve seen them. This wish seems about as farfetched as time travel, but it’s worth a shot. If this isn’t possible, sprinkle some fairy dust on our wifi strength and tell USPS not to lose any of my packages, please.
2. I would love it if Chuck could literally tell me that she wants a sister, of the orange variety, named Linus.
3. I could definitely use a new battery for my fitness motivation. I lost my charger back in May and haven’t been able to find it…
4. Hear me out: New Harry Potter films! Maybe we follow their adult lives. Maybe we get to see all new Hogwarts shenanigans with their kids. Maybe it’s literally them sitting around a table at The Leaky Cauldron playing poker. Just give me some of that wizarding world splendor!
5. Could I borrow an elf for a week? I need someone young and creative to help me with a few things in the social media space. Ya girl is trying to solidify a side hustle.
6. I wouldn’t hate a teleportation device.
7. I’m writing early, so I’m hoping that I can ask for, and receive in advance, an invisible safety shield for the Christmas tree. You see, Chucks and trees don’t mix well.
8. Is Elf 2 ever happening? Can you make it happen? If you have that kind of pull, go ahead and bump this request up to the number 2 spot.
9. The Laguna Beach reunion, but like on TV, with multiple seasons, no more of this 20 minutes of youtube junk.
10. Lastly, and as always, Santa, can you make sure to keep this magic alive and well with me:
    

xoxo Santa, can you hear me?

P.S. Tell all the elves they need to be watching Vlogmas daily on @shutupcrystal’s Youtube channel!