Baby, It’s Cold Outside

Alternative titles:

I’m So Sick, Literally My Skin Hurts

Couch Potato: Becoming One With Your Furniture

Time Wasting 101

Hello, all! As I mentioned fleetingly in my last post, I’ve not been feeling well. In fact, I’ve literally not left my couch or bed for the last 48 hours with the exception of going to Minute Clinic to be prescribed something to tame these demons. I thought I had a bit of a cold, but as I’m closing in on seven days of total misery, and seem to be getting worse instead of better, I’m going to deem this the flu with a bonus of double ear infection, confirmed by doctor. The antibiotics I’m on are chihuahua sized. I wish they worked better…?

This is 100% karma getting me back for shaming anyone who tells me they’re getting a flu shot. (Yes, I have watched that video of the pro cheerleader who can now only function in life by moving backward. No, this isn’t insensitive, it is just me believing that little clip of internet is true. Yes, I am afraid of flu shots, apparently more than getting the flu, it would seem.)

Also, I just have to vent. If this truly is just the common cold, I fear the flu would end me.

Anyway, carrying on. Facebook and my office would confirm that many, many, of you have also succumbed to the plague, or are experiencing snow, cold and general, stay-inside weather, so I figured I would share what I’ve been doing to pass the time. Hopefully, you’ll find some of these things entertaining as well!

Firstly, I have spent a ludicrous amount of time on Youtube. This is definitely not a new thing for me, as often I will hop on Youtube to search for pretty acoustic song covers, and reemerge into reality four hours later, feeling like I really must’ve entered a wormhole of some sort. However, I am slightly ashamed to admit that I just recently created a Youtube account only a few weeks ago, so I could subscribe to some channels. In the weeks since, I’ve become absolutely obsessed with Zoella and her squad. Her boyfriend, PointlessBlog’s (Alfie Deyes) videos are also hysterical. Also, I definitely like Marcus Butler’s channel, maybe because he’s just so dang cute. Anway, if you click around through Zoella’s videos, you will see the likes of those people I mentioned, as well as her brother and some of their friends, most all of them Youtubers. You will fall in love with their accents. You will have new friend and relationship goals. If this sounds odd to you, check out this this video, which has given me endless laughter for the past few days. (I am sipping cough syrup pretty heavily though, so if I change my mind about the entertainment value of all of these people, I’ll let you know!)

Second on the list, Superstore. I had mentioned in My Weekly Winter TV Lineup that I was excited to start watching this show, and it hasn’t let me down at all! Perhaps, I’m a teensy bit biased about the hilarity because I worked in retail for a loooong eight years of my life, (my pier and moose people, you will love this show!) but so far, the cast and plot has been killer. Plus, Ben Feldman is ridiculously good looking, and I am anxiously awaiting a sort of love story. Not really a spoiler alert. Thank goodness, right? Because I told you after. Anyway, if you want to catch up on this, all of the aired episodes are now On Demand, as well as on hulu, or you can catch up with the NBC link above! I really hope people love the show as much as I do, because my heart really isn’t up for another Community (also on hulu) situation. #sixseasonsandamovie FOR LIFE!

I’ve been doing a little bit of reading, and my current book is Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari. I was a little skeptical to share this one with anyone, because I’ve wanted it for such a long time and when I anxiously cracked it open on Christmas Day, I was a little disappointed. Maybe disappointed is a strong word; the book has just not been at all like I expected it to be. I mean, Aziz is hilarious, so I just assumed the book would be as well, but it turns out that it is a literal statistical and interview based study about modern romances, i.e. online dating, how millennials choose their soulmates, etc. The more I read, the more intrigued I am. If I were single and Tindering like many of my friends, this book would be my lifeline. For me though, I just get to sound like a real snobby know-it-all when I bitchily proclaim to my Tindering pals, “The longer you text and put off meeting up in person, the less likely meeting in person becomes! It’s science!”

Finally, I did want to mention some boring adultly thing because I’ve been trying to fit it in a blog somewhere, but don’t have enough correlating content. My husband has been the real MVP taking care of me this week with surprise curly fries, shoulder rubs, and literally not an ounce of anger in his tone when I asked him to get me Smoothie King the other day, so it is very (maybe selfishly?) important to me that he doesn’t catch this crap. So, yesterday I decided to disinfect our master bathroom before he got home to get my phlegmy grime off of everything. (Gosh, I am so attractive.) Since we got our cat Charlie, it’s been impossible to disregard her love for the shower (so weird) and her extreme interest in the toilet brush. Showers and toilets are things I clean a lot, and it’s important to me that she not  be licking cleaning products, as a crazy cat might do. A few months ago, we were shopping for some expecting friends at Babies R Us, when I stumbled upon the largest collection of The Honest Company that I’ve ever seen. I got the Bathroom Cleaner, Toilet Cleaner, and Glass + Window cleaner, then used every ounce of will power I had to not get more. As it turns out, you don’t want your pets licking any cleaner, but these are much less harsh smelling and SURPRISE! No animals were harmed in the making of these products! Yay! (Plus, the shower has stayed soap scum free for much longer!)

Anyway, Youtube and giant amoxicillin beckon, but I hope this fine Saturday finds you in better shape than me, or at least with some fun things to fill your time now, if you too are in these sick shoes!

xoxo flumageddon